Fishosaur

Giant ocean sunfish forklifted away

You're going to need to turn your head sideways for this unfortunate picture:

That's an ocean sunfish, also known as Mola Mola, of the order tetraodontiformes. That picture was taken near Zamboanga City in the Philippines. These beasties can reach a ton and are most likely the largest bony fish in the world. And, according to this, they may contain toxins, but despite that some consider them a delicacy.

Supposedly Kamogawa SeaWorld caught the largest one of these: 8.9 feet from stem to stern and tipping the scales at 5071 pounds.

You can see a head-on drawing of a young one here, there are historic pictures here and here, and Kyle Weis was captured examining one here.

Max Mayfield, grouper in hot, salty water

Did political enemies of former National Hurricane Center director Max Mayfield "snitch" on him? That is the frightening possibility that first crossed my mind when learning that he was being investigated by the National Marine Fisheries Service, which is part of NOAA (National Oceanic & Atmospheric Administration). The NHC is also part of that agency.

It happened like this:

The day after retiring, he went on a fishing trip in the Gulf of Mexico, and he landed a 200 pound Goliath Grouper, also called a "Jewfish" (I don't make up these names, people). They dragged it into the boat, took a picture, then released it. Only one problem: that fish is on the endangered species list, and even just pulling it out of the water may (or may not) harm protective slime covered the fish. Someone saw the picture in the paper and dropped a dime, resulting in the investigation. Just an over-zealous PETA member or the like? Or, something perhaps related to his work at the NHC? And, who else is in on the conspiracy?

Miss Vietnam brings fish to festival

At first glance, you might ask, "Why is Miss Vietnam Mai Phuong Thuy carrying a fish?" At second glance, you might ask, "What is she doing with her hand? Is she, you know, carrying something else? Is the Miss a former Mr.?"

I urge you to purge all such thoughts from your mind and enjoy the spectacle of a beautiful young lady carrying food. And, in fact, she has a good explanation: it was for a TV episode about the upcoming Tet festival in Vietnam, to take place from February 16 to 20.

Frilled shark video from Japan

Courtesy of the Awashima Marine Park (via CNN, via some guy video taping his TV) comes this video of a "frilled shark", a rarely seen species known as Chlamydoselachus anguineus. AP report here. They normally live thousands of feet beneath the waves, and they've changed little over time and are thus sometimes supposedly called a "living fossil". The one in the video is a female and about 5 feet long, and it unfortunately went to the big fishery in the sky shortly after being moved into a seawater pool where the video was shot. Per an official of the park:

"We believe moving pictures of a live specimen are extremely rare... They live between 1,968 and 3,280 feet (600 and 1,000 meters) under the water, which is deeper than humans can go... We think it may have come close to the surface because it was sick, or else it was weakened because it was in shallow waters."

English move, fondle, prepare giant squid

Blimey: almost three minutes of odd entertainment are on tap as a group of English persons move, fondle, probe, and otherwise prepare a giant squid to go on display at Britain's Natural History Museum. As described on their page, the beastie in question is an Architeuthis dux, and it's 8.62 metres long (about 28 feet).

The animal is originally from the Falkland Islands, and our sources reveal that Argentina is reportedly considering miltary action against the museum. Other questions to ponder are, of course, why one of the Squid Experts has bright dyed red hair. Could someone who would do something like that be in any way qualified to perform this delicate, specialist task? And, why does this whole video look like something from a Monty Python or Benny Hill sketch? And, wouldn't it be even better with an Art of Noise soundtrack?

Paris Hilton, cell phones, and a huge tuna

Welcome to the winner of the 2006 "Make up your own joke" competition! In this photo, Paris Hilton is shown posing with a huge tuna fish and a cellphone at the Tsukiji Honganji Temple in Tokyo on December 22, 2006. Hilton and the fish were brought in by NTT DoCoMo and Motorola for the launch of their new FOMA M702iS mobile phone.

Video: Huge catfish caught

Here's video of a huge catfish being reeled in:

There's no word on where the vidoe was shot, who was involved, or anything else. They seem to have British accents, but they don't look like the three who caught a Wels catfish in Spain.

Giant Swordfish: netted or photoshopped?

Normally this site only features big fishes that are undeniably real. But, I'm expanding the charter a bit here to ask a question about the story "Giant swordfish netted" from England's Sun newspaper. Does anyone believe that this is a real photo of a swordfish caught off Northumberland in the North Sea? Does anyone who believes that that's not either a photoshop or a pre-stuffed trophy not also say 'cor blimey' every other sentence?

If this turns out to be fake it will shake my previously unswerving belief in anything I read in The Sun.

UPDATE: I may have to change my mind, due to the additional picture here (cached here). It's from Ananova, so you know this must be on the up and up.

UPDATE 2: The Beeb has this story too. I'm slightly more inclined to believe it, yet they offer little beyond what The Sun did, and nowhere in there is there any indication that they actually verified that it's a real fishy:

Sen. Lisa Murkowski, a huge King Salmon, and lots of money

A couple weeks ago Senator Lisa Murkowski and some close friends participated in the 11th annual Kenai River Classic, a fundraiser for that river in Alaska. It raised $800,000. The largest fish was a 67-pound King Salmon, caught by a vice-president of British Petroleum. However, the only picture we have available is that of plucky Lisa, whose catch weighed in at 63 pounds.

Oh, and by the way, around 200 people attended the event including several other Senators and lobbyists for major corporations. But, don't worry about that and the hugely negative impact of lobbyists being joined at the hip waders with our elected representatives, this is just a site about fish.

Huge tuna vs. Japanese Fish Market workers

One day you're a huge tuna swimming pacifically in the sea. The next moment, you're sushi.

Well, not quite. In between there are a few intervening steps, as the following video shows. Warning: do not watch this video if you do not have a strong constitution. No, really. Watch this one instead.

World's smallest fish: a carp from Indonesia

The world's smallest fish has been located living in an acidic peat swamp on the island of Sumatra in Indonesia.

It has been termed the "Paedocypris progenetica" and is a member of the carp family. Despite being only .31 inches (7.9 millimeters), the males have "exceptionally large muscles" and "enlarged pelvic fins". Boffins speculate these are used for the things you don't want to think about as you're drinking water.

As the picture shows, or doesn't show, it has a transparent body. We're sure there's a fish in that container, because the AP says there is. Moreover, its head is unprotected by a skeleton.

Fishologists Maurice Kottelat (Switzerland; posing above) and Tan Heok Hui (Raffles Museum of Biodiversity Research in Singapore) made the discovery together with Kai-Erik Witte (Max Planck Institute in Germany) and local experts.

Note: I'm sure some might quibble, but I hasten to assure you that our charter does not expressly forbid showing people posing with tiny fishies.

Japan attacked by giant jellyfish!

Driven by the hand of man - including the dreaded Global Warming - and carried by ocean currents, monstrous jellyfish weighing up to over 400 pounds and with a diameter of over six feet are invading the Pacific side of Japan, Asahi reports.

The squiggly beasts - named Echizen kurage or Nomura's jellyfish and a very distant relative of the more famous godzillacus giganticus - are having a devastating impact on fishing, damaging fixed nets and scratching fish with their tentacles, reducing the value of a fisherman's catch.

Building like a breathless crescendo of fear, the sightings came in:

- In July off Kochi Prefecture...
- In mid-August, off the Kiisuido region, which covers coastal Wakayama to Mihama in Wakayama Prefecture...
- In October, off the Boso Peninsula in Chiba Prefecture...
- In late October, off Togawan in Oga, Akita Prefecture. At that time, fully 5000 of the gelatinous beasts were spotted...
- Off the Kurohime coast in Sado, Niigata Prefecture, a dozen fisherman found that almost all of their catch was the poisonously-tentacled beasts...
- "Hundreds" have been caught in nets in Aomori, Hokkaido, Iwate and Shimane prefectures...
- 12/7/05 UPDATE: Japan's Liberal Democratic Party has initiated a "countermeasures committee", and a multi-national summit featuring Japan, China, and South Korea is planned for this month... We wish them well...

And, the worst thing about this is... all of this could be prevented if only top scientists had been listened to. They warn that the root cause for this attack is overfishing and development in south Asia, especially China. The daunting solution: get all the coastal countries to agree to reverse the trends.

Of course, the ever-resourceful Japanese have come up with a temporary solution: conducting boat tours and enabling brave tourists to touch the monsters. And, even tastier, eating them.

12-pound lobster "Fat Joe" wins pardon

In a case that has received worldwide attention, including statements from president Bush, Kofi and Kojo Annan of the United Nations, the Pope, as well as a worldwide television special featuring Bono, the 12 pound lobster which was recently caught off the coast of Massachusetts has been spared and will not become dinner, NBC10 reports. Video at the link.

Instead of being consumed, this magnificent beast - nicknamed "Fat Joe" - will be shipped to an aquarium to do whatever it is that crustaceans do. A tip of the butter sauce to the restauranteur in Milford CT who made this humanitarian decision.

The new caretakers of this gigantic sea dweller are the Mystic Aquarium and Institute for Exploration. According to Abby Brogan, their supervisor of fish and invertebrates:

"We were very excited when we heard about the lobster ...People don't often get a chance to see a lobster that big."

However: they already have one in Fat Joe's weight class, and even a behemoth weighing in at 25 pounds.

Giant Great White Shark in New Zealand

Pictured above is New Zealand commercial fisherman Warwick Harris posing with the jaws of a massive Great White Shark that got caught in his nets off the Waikato coast. It was 15 feet long and weighed in at 3300 pounds. The remainder of the shark is with scientists who are investigating the matter.

Harris was fishing for snapper and gurnard when he tried to pull in his net and failed. He was forced to tow it back to port; the shark was already dead and they suspect it might have been preggers.

A surfing competition is planned for tomorrow (some time next week NZ time), but organizers assure us it will go on as planned, despite the fact that even a large human being will completely fit inside the massive deadly jaws shown above.

Apparently the mandibular portion of the beast will be sold on "TradeMe", which is the Kiwi equivalent of eBay. We will keep you informed should you wish to bid.

Giant squid captured on film (Tokyo, Japan)

Giant squid researcher Tsunemi Kubodera from Tokyo, Japan's National Science Museum as well as Kyoichi Mori of the Ogasawara Whale Watching Association have captured the first pictures of a live squid.

All previous pics of these mysterious beasts have been of ones that washed ashore or were otherwise non-functioning. They captured more than 500 images using a baited hook. As the picture above shows, the animal caught his tentacle in the hook. After a long struggle, he broke free, but without his appendage. (They grow back, so no letters from PETA please).

These pictures were taken at a depth of 2,950' (900m) off Japan's Ogasawara Islands. The creature himself (or herself) was about 25 feet long.

The beastie was just lucky that one of his fellows didn't chance along, as there are reports that they reportedly eat their own.

UPDATE: The news just gets more and more damning for these enormous beasts. The Independent informs us that scientists from the Institute of Marine Research in Vigo discuss the intimate lives of these Architeuthis dux in the magazine of the International Council for the Exploration of the Seas:

This is no ordinary eight-foot penis. It is hypodermic, and hence able to pierce the female's arm and impregnate her.

Not only that, but the owner has horribly bad aim, occasionally plunging his squidhood into other males... and even himself!

"The male's sexual organ is actually a bit like a high-pressure fire hose and is normally nearly as long as his body, excluding legs and head... But having such a big penis does have one drawback: it seems co-ordinating eight legs, two feeding tentacles and a huge penis, whilst fending off an irate female, is a bit too much to ask, and one of the two males stranded had accidentally injected himself with sperm packages in the legs and body."

Just keep repeating to yourself: it's nature's way, it's nature's way.